copperbadge:

duckdotcom:

why don’t you agitate the contents of a barrel full of cream for a while then reach your hand inside and maybe you’ll feel butter

Why don’t you mix it with some eggs and sugar and flour and a little vanilla and dip your finger in and maybe you’ll feel batter. 

sketiana:

sybilvimes:

everyone check out my new ya fantasy novel called a court of blood, bone, ash, roses, thorns, fire, ice, stone, ravens, enemies to lovers, fake dating, two number 9s, a number 5 large, and an extra large fries

intjint:

newvegasdyke:

You’re not punk you’ll never be punk your clothes are from shein and your makeup is from TikTok

yurimage:

The coelacanth, my favorite girl <3

fishgirlautism:

bogleech:

00111011011110110001011101100101:

Hares or rats? Hares or rats? Sir, hares or rats? Here you go! Hares or rats? Hares or rats? Ma'am? Hares or

dw:

your cock is unoriginal. it calls from cliched and exhausted references and makes no effort to construct meaning past the obvious

needsmoreexplosions:

bites down on my false tooth that contains a pill that makes me grow a real tooth

itwashotwestayedinthewater:

youve never walked the earth. i can tell.

anarchoarchie:

supplementes:

amish Lana Del Rey would be like “mmmmhm honey I’m your little corn husk doll *spoons rattling*

coughloop:

pa said the family gnome bit someone down by the quarry today. said i have to take the poor thing out back and step on it til it dies

grimeclown:

diasporaslippage:

Nobody wants to acknowledge this ESPECIALLY on the left but unfortunately we’ve got to face the facts. Big strawberry